Sending you love, Stevie. The rootlessness makes so much sense to me, the shock. Even though LA felt like home from the first time I visited, it took years for me to let this place grow into me. When I temporarily moved to the Bay for grad school it was a severe shock to my system and, though I had finally started to find the rhythm of the place by the time I left almost exactly 3 years later, coming back to LA was such a relief to me. However, I came back in summer 2020, and it was another shock to realize the city I left and the city I returned to were so vastly different. Now i've been here for almost 5 years (11 years total, and 3 in the Bay) and its back in my rhythms and my bones. But I recognize the feeling you're describing, and the long slow process of growing into a place, and letting it grow into you.
I hope that the PNW holds healing, pleasure, and joy for you. I hope that your body and spirit can find gentle rest.
Thank you for this Eli, it's so comforting to hear about your experience and I appreciate what you're naming around how different a place is after we've left it for a while. Even when it still feels familiar. This was a layer of my experience in this decision too- we'd thought about moving back to LA, back to our old neighborhood in Pasadena/Altadena and then the fires happened. There's a particular kind of ecological grief you and I are talking about here.
And how nice to hear that you've found the rhythm again and breathed that place back into your bones again even after the shock and grief. I so glad both you and Los Angeles have that with each other.
Thank you for these well wishes <3 Sending you lots of love my friend
💗💗💗“How important to remember the unseen forces when we fear destabilization.“
Sending you love, Stevie. The rootlessness makes so much sense to me, the shock. Even though LA felt like home from the first time I visited, it took years for me to let this place grow into me. When I temporarily moved to the Bay for grad school it was a severe shock to my system and, though I had finally started to find the rhythm of the place by the time I left almost exactly 3 years later, coming back to LA was such a relief to me. However, I came back in summer 2020, and it was another shock to realize the city I left and the city I returned to were so vastly different. Now i've been here for almost 5 years (11 years total, and 3 in the Bay) and its back in my rhythms and my bones. But I recognize the feeling you're describing, and the long slow process of growing into a place, and letting it grow into you.
I hope that the PNW holds healing, pleasure, and joy for you. I hope that your body and spirit can find gentle rest.
Thank you for this Eli, it's so comforting to hear about your experience and I appreciate what you're naming around how different a place is after we've left it for a while. Even when it still feels familiar. This was a layer of my experience in this decision too- we'd thought about moving back to LA, back to our old neighborhood in Pasadena/Altadena and then the fires happened. There's a particular kind of ecological grief you and I are talking about here.
And how nice to hear that you've found the rhythm again and breathed that place back into your bones again even after the shock and grief. I so glad both you and Los Angeles have that with each other.
Thank you for these well wishes <3 Sending you lots of love my friend